Not all of us went though, Farid was still bedridden. Audi and I are still sick, but not as bad as that. Andrew's the only one who still seems all hyper and enthusiastic, which makes me want to smack him, because for all that energy, he couldn't have picked up a bloody phone?!
Anyway. My mood didn't improve after watching the footage either. He found something "interesting" in a particular shot and chose to torture me with it. We'd been filming in this particular room that had made me feel very uncomfortable, and I told the guys in no uncertain terms I wanted out. And it was the shot in that room that showed something shadowy behind me. I freaked out when I saw that footage, and I was on the verge of tears, but the two of them just dismissed it as a trick of the light, and went on talking as if nothing happened.
I guess we've all been friends long enough that they've forgotten that I'm a girl. It doesn't help that I try to tough it out, to be one of the guys. But somehow yesterday, maybe it was the flu, maybe I was just not myself, but I was so shaken by what I saw that I nearly broke down, and no one gave a damn. I was so scared I just wanted to stand in bright sunshine and hope that it would cleanse me. I know it sounds incredibly girly and selfish of me, but I just wanted someone to ask if I was ok, and neither of them did. From Andrew's post on the production blog, it's pretty clear that my reaction on that night and yesterday were nothing more than "interesting". It's almost as though I'm nothing more than some character in a film he's directing. I can't believe he even has the cheek to post pictures of me looking freaked out.
I'm literally sick of this project. And since we don't have filming for the next few days, I'm taking a break and spending some time doing my own stuff, like looking for another gig, spending some time with my family and friends. Well, friends who care, anyway.
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